Today I want to talk about men and their profile pictures. As I've read over all these profiles for the past few months, I have fully come to understand the old cliche, a picture is worth 1000 words. You can write all the things to interest a woman, but if the pictures aren't there to back up what you are saying, then women are going to pass. Let's take a quiz below to see if your profile pictures are portraying the image you want:
1. A great head shot of you, perhaps taken by a friend or a timer feature. In said head shot, you are smiling, looking friendly. 500 points
2. Your head shot has you not smiling and looking like you need a Tums. (Also, pay attention to what is behind you in the head shot. I've come across lots of profiles with dirty laundry, unmade beds, and crazy looking yards in the background.) -200 points
3. You have a nice picture of you with your family, especially if you have nieces and nephews. One of you playing with them at Christmas is fantastic. Women like men who are not afraid of children. 250 points.
4. You have an awkward family photo and your nieces and nephews look at you confused because you never talk to them and now you're taking a picture with them. They know you are just trying to use them to get women. Stop it. -100 per niece or nephew
5. There is A picture of you doing your favorite activities. You can run marathons, do mission work, scuba dive (BTW, apparently a lot of American men have waterproof cameras and they take pictures of themselves scuba diving. I thought the first one was a fluke, but I've now seen at least 15 profiles with the scuba dive picture.), play in a band, etc. Women like to see that you have a life. 100 points per picture per activity.
6. Now, if you have multiple pictures of you doing the same activity, a problem arises. Here is picture number 1 of you rock climbing in the Rockies because you said you liked to rock climb. But as I browse your profile I see seven more rock climbing pictures. Not to mention the five of you on a deer hunt, complete with the deer you finally got. Multiple pictures of you doing the same activity tell me you really, really, really love this activity. But it gives me the impression that there isn't really a margin of time for a relationship in your life. -100 per picture of same activity.
7. Pictures of you with your friends. It is always nice to see a man hanging out with his people. Again, it's a great sign for women to see you enjoying everyday things and shows emotional health. We don't have to be worried that you are a future Dateline NBC story waiting to happen. 200 points
8. Now if the pictures include your ex, whether you have cropped her out, blurred her out, or just let it hang out there, that's not a "friend" we want to see you with. First, it makes us wonder if you are ready for a new relationship if you're still uploading pictures of the past. Second, it makes us wonder what happened if you all broke up. Instead of being interested, suddenly we are wondering "What is up with this guy?" -200 points
9. Photos of you on vacation are great! Women like to know if you like to take a break from work, so it is fun to see you at the beach, in the forest, at national monuments, etc. 100 points per picture. BUT... If all of your vacation photos are shirtless with alcohol in your hand...-350 points per picture. Women are not interested in men who vacation like college spring breakers when you haven't seen the inside of a college classroom in the past five, ten, fifteen years. (Side note: This is not Facebook or Instagram. Even if you saw an awesome sight, like a whale jumping out of the water in Alaska, please don't upload it to your dating profile. We are on a dating site to get a preview of you, not see a picture that would make a great desktop background. -50 points per vacation shot that does not include you.)
10. FINALLY.... If you have a "selfie" picture of you in the bathroom mirror, regardless of your shirt on or off, you immediately need to take down your profile. Just don't do it. It makes you look like a total self absorbed jerk. Or that you have no friends to take your picture for you. Neither makes a woman say, "Hey, I think I want to date this guy because of his bathroom selfie." -All the points for online dating, even though the points don't matter.
Now men, it's your turn. What are photo cliches you have come across from us women? What photos and poses do we need to retire? What photos draw you in or scare you away? Sound off below!
2 comments:
This is a good post. I passed all 10 of your quiz questions and earned 10,000 points. Big thanks to the loving women in my family that I allow full access to my profile. Men I think it's very important to allow a female to read through your profile. The reason is because us men don't think like women. And that shirtless photo that you posted from the finish line of your obstacle course race...while its something you are proud of...women might see you as 'full of yourself' or 'meat head' or heaven forbid the D word...'d-bag.' :-)
Women tend to be smarter when it comes to online dating. I see fewer errors. Never the less, here are a few turns offs that I see from time to time:
*Blurry photos.
*Photos of your high-school or college years (I don't care what you looked like 10 years ago).
*Cleavage photos (automatic deal breaker)
*pics with your ex cut out.
*no smiles
*lack of full body shots (what are you hiding?)
*too many pics with a beer in your hand and/or too many bar pics
*posting only 1 or 2 pics
*mirror pics
*car selfies (not a deal breaker but not my favorite)
*choosing to post zero pics- auto deal breaker. I won't invest in someone who won't post photos.
rick overton- okc, ok
According to your criteria, I too know how to craft the perfect profile...if you are Sherry's brother I'm sure you were well trained, she's very sweet! :-)
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