Releasing Control, Pt.5

    In 2012, I had my teaching career.   I enjoyed my team as well as the faculty on staff at the school I was employed with. I was starting to look at houses in the area thinking I could make some roots.  But God had other plans.  He opened the door to a job at a Christian private school, which has helped me to grow in so many ways.  It was a huge step of faith, but I know God has been with me all the way.  It definitely has been a green pasture for my soul. Then the money for the house had to go to all kinds of other things. 30 years old and living with my parents.  That was definitely not in my plans.  Now I am looking at this time as a gift.  I get to spend time with my parents, time I might not always have.  It has helped to understand the male psyche a bit (thanks Dad).  Apparently you can say whatever you want when ESPN is on TV because they are not listening.  Now I know the time to not ask important questions.

     During August, God was very clear that I needed to be still and wait on Him to bring my husband in my life.  That really didn't go over well at first, because to my logical mindset, how in the world would I meet anyone just waiting on God?  But over and over God was clear until I finally surrendered to His idea for my dating life in October.  It hasn't been easy, though, because at times I have wanted to lunge for the control again.  However, when I seek Him and focus on Him, it becomes easy to surrender and walk in His way, in His promises.

        There was a sermon in July that pretty much sums up the past eight months of letting go of control. It was by Pierre Du Plessis and in it he reminded me that I am more than dust, I am clay in the hands of the Supreme Potter. I have re-listened to it, taken more notes on it, and even mediated on the scriptures in it. I have had Jeremiah 18:6 posted on my nightstand since December. God has repeated this message as I am re-reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan.  It really is not all about me, what I think is best.  God's ways are higher than mine, and He loves me so much  He has plans things for my life that will allow me to glorify Him best.  I need to just stop and turn the control over to the One who is really the wisest about it all. Fortunately for me, God's grace covers me, taking my sin of control and removing it as far as the east is from the west.  It was a hard year of surrender to the Lord in 2012, but definitely a lesson I need to learn.  God is in control of all things in my life.